“Boys Will Be Boys”: White House Spirals Out of Control as Caroline Leavitt Delivers Disastrous Briefing Amid Economic Freefall

The markets were just beginning to breathe again. After a historic crash last week that wiped out $10 trillion in value, Wall Street was inching upward—until the White House stepped in.

At a jaw-dropping press conference that many are calling catastrophic, Trump’s press secretary Caroline Leavitt confirmed that 104% tariffs on China will take effect at 12:01 a.m. tonight. The announcement sent markets into an immediate nosedive.

“When America is punched, he punches back harder,” Leavitt declared proudly, doubling down on a decision that economists warn could trigger a global recession.

But the tariffs weren’t the only bombshell. The press briefing quickly unraveled into a chaotic parade of falsehoods, contradictions, and what can only be described as national gaslighting.

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No Due Process, No Problem?

When asked whether deported migrants, many kidnapped and forcibly sent to El Salvador, were entitled to due process after a chilling Supreme Court decision, Leavitt brushed it off:

“They’re entitled to a habeas petition,” she quipped, implying that basic rights were optional under Trump’s interpretation of justice.

Legal scholars immediately criticized the statement as an open embrace of authoritarianism. “This isn’t policy—it’s punishment theater,” one civil liberties lawyer told CNN.

Musk vs. Navarro: The Boys Are Fighting

The briefing took a surreal turn when Leavitt was asked about the public feud between Elon Musk and Trump trade adviser Peter Navarro.

Musk, frustrated with the chaos of the tariffs, called Navarro “dumber than a sack of bricks.” Leavitt’s response?

“Boys will be boys.”

Yes. That’s the official line from the White House—“boys will be boys”—as two of the most powerful men in the country bicker over policies impacting hundreds of millions of lives.

Let that sink in.

Netanyahu and the Gaza “Real Estate” Deal

In a bizarre pivot, Leavitt tried to spin Trump’s meeting with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu as proof of his “deal-making genius.” She claimed Netanyahu promised to eliminate the U.S. trade deficit with Israel and remove barriers.

Left unspoken was the controversial private exchange where Trump and Netanyahu reportedly referred to Gaza as “great real estate”—and discussed clearing it of Palestinians. The statement, leaked by an Israeli source, has already sparked international outrage.

$30,000 iPhones? That’s the Plan

Leavitt also confirmed the administration wants the entire iPhone supply chain relocated to the U.S., despite Apple’s reliance on a vast global network of suppliers.

Pressed on whether the president envisioned Americans assembling iPhones by hand, Leavitt responded:

“Absolutely. We have the labor, the workforce, the resources.”

What she didn’t mention? Analysts estimate that a U.S.-made iPhone would cost upwards of $30,000—a price tag that sent consumers into a panic-buying spree this week.

Warp Speed or Warped Priorities?

Asked about the timeline for the chaotic trade negotiations, Leavitt offered this gem:

“We always move at Trump speed here… incredibly fast.”

She insisted that every deal would be custom-made, “not off-the-rack,” despite warnings from Treasury and economic advisers that some talks could drag on into summer.

No Recession? Tell That to Wall Street

Goldman Sachs now puts the odds of a U.S. recession at 45%, up from 35% just weeks ago. But Peter Navarro says there’s “no chance.” Leavitt, echoing the denial, claimed oil and egg prices were down, and that tax cuts would save the day.

But the real numbers tell a different story: The market remains in freefall, foreign investment is stalling, and panic is quietly setting in across industries.

“They’re All Terrorists” – A Chilling Claim

In what may have been the darkest moment of the briefing, Leavitt falsely claimed that everyone deported to El Salvador was a terrorist or gang member—a claim that flies in the face of DHS data showing 75% have no criminal record.

“They’re all MS-13 or Trenda,” she said. No evidence. No nuance. Just fear.

This isn’t just a press conference. It’s a masterclass in authoritarian propaganda.

A Nation Adrift

The Trump administration isn’t just making reckless decisions—it’s flaunting them. With markets crashing, civil liberties under threat, and international alliances burning, the White House seems hell-bent on doubling down.

“Boys will be boys,” says Leavitt, as if the country were a schoolyard instead of a superpower.

But there are no playground rules in geopolitics. And the cost of this chaos may soon become too real to ignore.